I'm a mean little shit.

Its the night before easter, and mommy realized a few hours ago...shit! The easter bunny forgot to visit walmart when we got to town. So I put on my imaginary bunny ears and grabbed mimi and hauled ass to walmart. I picked the perfect stuff to build the easter baskets. Then my husband almost fucked it all up by not hiding things in the closet well.

You'd think he would have figured it out after the same shit happened TWICE at christmas and we spent triple what we should have to replace santa presents. No such luck. I'm betting my 5 year old already has a sneaking suspicion that there's a reason we put out mommys favorite cookies for santa and mommys favorite jelly beans to feed the easter bunny.

If he's as smart as I was, I'm screwed. I can only hope he will be nicer than I was. I have a sister that is 3 years older than me. I'm pretty sure she didn't try to get rid of me for no good reason over the years. When I came home from the hospital, I ran off her imaginary friend. When I was probably not much older than my son is now, I ratted my mom out for being the easter bunny, santa, and the tooth fairy. Like the title says, I'm a mean little shit.

If jon has the secrets of the 5 year old world figured out, I can only hope he doesn't decide to rat me out at the breakfast table like I did to my mom. Sorry mom!

A special congratulations to my mom. She finally married a decent man, and I'm happy to call him my dad. Mom, I would normally crack a joke on you at this point but tonight I will be nice since it is after all your wedding night.

I wish you all the happiness in the world and many bananas for your new gorrirra. Also, if he doesn't behave, you know I can whip his ass, and I will. My husband is looking mighty fine tonight, even though he basically called me trailer trash earlier, and I think since I'm done being the easter bunny, I'll go be a playboy bunny. ; )

Night y'all!

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