Strawberry milkshake oreo does not equal vagina.

Inside every fat girl, there is a skinny bitch being silenced with cookies. Mine prefers strawberry milkshake oreos. Though after reading a blog that compares them to a vagina, I don't know if I can ever look at them the same.

This is what I was thinking about at one am when I couldn't sleep. Cookies. Why? Because even if I weighed 120 lbs I would still be a fat kid at heart. I like my food guys. Food does not like me though. I remember when my sister hated me because I never gained weight. This is no longer the case.

Shitney told me recently she's lost 15 lbs! My ass found it. Literally. Id like to thank my kids for the giant boobs they gave me. I would also like to smack them for stealing my sanity and my waistline.

Triple J, I hope that one day you each have 3 children just like you. Ha! I just have you the fucking voodoo and you can't give it back!! Neener neener neener.

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